Infinite Content, Infinitely Content

Having discussed Portrait and coming-of-age in general in more details during class has made me slightly more attuned to the elements of coming-of-age stories. I’ve started noticing these patterns in a few of my favorite movies, so perhaps a comparison of them to Portrait is worthwhile. On his blog, Dylan mentioned the movie Breaking Away , one of my favorite movies probably (and not just because it features biking and Campagnolo bikes, although that is definitely a big reason). It’s a classic coming-of-age film, particularly in the sense that Dave becomes disillusioned with the thing he most believed in - Italian culture and cyclists. He’s in a bike race where he was ahead of these professional Italian cyclists, but they sabotage him and he doesn’t finish the race. When he comes home, instead of calling his mom and dad “papa” and “mama”, he returns to his American lingo. He tears down every single poster of Italy in his room and starts calling his cat Jake instead of Fellini. But...

In a lot of ways I find myself relating to Stephen, in all of his melodrama. I’m not proud but I remember liking the feeling of being the kid brooding outside, pretending I was somehow superior to those around me, or at least special. Stephen imagines himself dying, his funeral, coming across a romantic partner (or more being found; an encounter), etc. And to me, I feel like that’s just a normal way that kids thing (although I’m realizing I might be wrong, and maybe it’s not a normal experience). The scene in the tram especially hit me hard. I remember having a first crush, having a moment with them, not shooting my shot, and just feeling an absolutely crippling sense of regret afterwards. Which is silly, because I was probably 12 and had no idea what was going on and the person I know for a fact did not reciprocate the feelings. And yet I immersed myself in those new feelings, wrote crap poems about loneliness and whatever. And yet I didn’t really read the scene as predatory, as Emma ...